So there was a bit of overkill from the spiritual community, while my niece and I, and sometimes my brother and two aunts for short periods of time, attended to her physical needs, in an intense and demanding sharing of shift-work between just a few people. She was afforded the opportunity, though her Quaker way of living, to proceed to a Quaker way of dying. Yeah. But I can’t deal with the belly-fuzz picking, and I probably will not be able to for a very long time, if ever. We can reach out to those who have gone before us, and they can help us, if we believe that this life is far from all there is. So they have the vaults to hold them in place. Because I don’t think you’re still going to see … like a lot of cemeteries, you’ll see the statuary-type ones. Mackenzie: I’m not sure about this. The ceremony is usually very brief and features some additional prayers and spoken remembrances. I wanted to think a little bit about how the way friends apparently … I don’t know when this stuff started, because presumably we used to bury bodies, and at some point we decided to start cremating and having memorial services later. Mackenzie: So you can actually … I know there’s Alexandria friends meeting at Woodlawn in Virginia, they’re either the oldest or the second-oldest meeting in the DC region, and they have a burial ground where as you walk through you can see the eras of burial. What Quakers believe. The writing of a memorial minute was another Quaker tradition to document the passing of a Quaker life. The casket is oftentimes already buried (or at least lowered into the grave) before the ceremony begins. I truly became quietly sick and disgusted with all of the ministers and friends coming to pray with her by the end. I don’t necessarily have a strong opinion about how things ought to be, but what does that say about our theology? Micah: Well that’s fair. Quakers do not have specific beliefs about what happens after we die, but hope that our spirit lives on in the family and friends we leave behind. Because there’s the presence that a person has, and they’re present with you, and then they’re suddenly … death occurs, and then they are not there. Mackenzie: That sounds like copyright problems. Because there’s no body, and there’s no sense of resolution. I always thought that whole being skittish about cremation because the resurrection was a little bit weird, because tons of people die in shipwrecks and airline accidents and all sorts of other ways where the body is like dissolved. Micah: The Anti-Zombie feet shield. Once he finishes, he turns and shakes the hand of the other elder, signaling the end of the formal service. I’ve been a part of, has it had a negative impact on me? To Live Fully until Death: Lessons from the Dying, My Quakerism and my work for the past 25 years as a hospice nurse have informed and strengthened each other.…, © 2020 Friends Publishing Corporation. Because a lot of it is, “Oh, if I had to live in the such and so way, gosh, I don’t know how I could live. © 2012 - 2020 Funerals360, All rights reserved. Last year, desiring conversation on these questions, I facilitated an interest group I called “The Quaker Art of Dying” at the Pacific Northwest Quaker Women’s Theology Conference. It was agreed that a Quaker approach would involve less denial that someone is dying or that death is imminent. Often, Quakerism is defined as a way of life. Also, trigger warning for anyone sensitive to discussion of suicide, toward the end we talk about death with dignity laws. And you’ll see that imagery a lot in movies, cartoons, whatever. Everyone in the funeral group is invited to attend. Micah: They can be buried, but I bet you they’re probably also cremated before they’re buried. Micah: That’s kind of disturbing. Mackenzie: Well I think we have covered death and aspects thereof pretty well. I don’t have a clear memory, but I think it’s possible I may have seen my aunt Linda’s body after she died. I guess I’m thinking more of if you’ve already filled the prescription and have it sitting around, but haven’t decided whether to actually use it. Graveside service, if there is one, is usually reserved for family. We really do. To start, one of the elders may welcome the group and then recite a prayer, story, poem, song or other material. At the end of the funeral one of the Friends responsible for the funeral will signal that the coffin should be withdrawn and shake hands with the other elder. Those of us on the interdisciplinary healthcare team struggle, as best we can, to provide our dying patients with a “good death,” however they and their families define such. Micah: Do you know what you would prefer done with your body? But I wonder about … we’ve talked before about Quakers having a certain gnosticism, like a gnostic lean, and I wonder about … that kind of sounds like that too. For me, growing up, there were memorial services, for Faith growing up, there were funerals, and a funeral indicates the presence of the body. Mackenzie: That’s fair. This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. A Friend's perspective on money and philanthropy.

He experienced what he referred to as “openings,” instances in which he felt God was talking directly to him.Fox shared his religious beliefs and epiphanies with others, speaking to increasingly larger gatherings. Here are just a couple: Britain Yearly Meeting Faith and Practice Website: https://qfp.quaker.org.uk Today we’ve decided that we are going to talk about death. So just sort of as an occupational hazard, I’ve had the opportunity to think about it a lot. Is there something fundamentally wrong with being so disconnected from the physical reality of death? The primary emphasis of a Quaker funeral is twofold – to honor the life of the person and to experience God’s presence. Feels like one foot in heaven and your heart is full. Furthermore, when you bury someone, I mean give it a hundred years, that body is just dust. There may be music, either instrumental or hymn singing, depending on the traditions of the meeting. For an optimal experience and to access all the free planning tools: Saving favorite articles is a Premium feature. [crosstalk 00:26:52]. Katherine Jaramillo is a staff chaplain at Legacy Good Samaritan Medical Center in Portland, Ore. She has worked in healthcare chaplaincy for 20 years. The group was well attended and diverse. We are your hosts, Mackenzie and […]

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